After a few weeks of discussing men, and their lame tinder pickup lines with my friends and co-workers, I decided that it’s time we have a real heart to heart about this. Ladies, if you know your male friends are guilty of being THAT guy, send this to his inbox as a friendly reminder that this is what NOT to do.
Fellas, I know you have your “tried and true” lines that might work 5 time out of 10—Here’s a little secret, she is probably still talking to you because she is bored or appreciates that you have the confidence to let those words slip out of your mouth.
1. Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? I mean it did, but we don’t have to state the obvious here. This line is older than my great-grandmother. Next time you think about using it…don’t.
2. Is that a mirror in your back pocket because I see me in your jeans? First of all, thanks for telling me that you’ve been staring at my a$$ this entire time. Now that we’ve cleared that up, this pickup line just plain ol’ sucks. It portrays you as more of a perv than a gentleman and no woman want to date a perv (in case that wasn’t clear). Next time try something less demeaning.
3. Are you Katniss, because you’re starting an up rise in my district? I actually chuckled at this one. You get points for pop culture references but that’s about it. I’m causing an uprise in your district? This is almost as bad as, “Is that a gun in your pants or are you just happy to see me.” In case you needed further clarification...I want NOTHING to do with it
4. Mind if I slytherin into your chamber of secrets? I do mind actually. While I am a HUGE Harry Potter fan, I wouldn’t want you or any of your other slither friends near me. You almost disgust me more than Malfoy—and that’s saying a lot.
5. Do you have a map, because I got lost in your eyes? You ALMOST got me here, you are asking for directions (we all know men hate doing that) and you’re talking about a body part that is above my collarbone so you get double points. However, you could have just told me I had beautiful eyes versus watching me roll them as soon as these words left your lips. Nice try but…NEXT!
These are some of the ridiculous ones I have heard over the past few weeks. What are your favorite pick-up lines that need to be retired?
Three women going through life.