I was definitely one of those teenagers that said, ‘I can’t wait to get out of this house and do what I want, when I want!’ Does this ring true to you guys? Well, the day I stepped out of my mother’s house for college, I heard angels singing and trumpets playing, marking my independence. I was glad that I was out! Free at last! I had promised myself to never turn out like my mother. Was she strict? Somewhat … I just knew that I did not want to be her - or so I thought!
Fast forward to my first semester in college. I wasn’t known to be the tidiest girl at home - a bone of contention with my mother. However, when I got to college and lived with other girls who were messy, because their mothers had catered to them hand and foot,; I quickly took on the persona of mama bear and got my act together.
My attention to detail and spontaneous allergic reactions to unclean surfaces were the first signs. My room completely transformed and became the most sacred space in that apartment. I never wanted to see any dishes left in the sink or last night’s party remnants still on the ground 48 hours after the party had ended. Why were people so gross?!!! This is what I asked myself most days when my roommates walked past pizza crust that was on the ground for a third day in a row right next to their bed! Was this what my mother felt?
The second sign came when I started sounding like her. Have you ever said something and done a double take? Like, did those words just come out of my mouth? Yeah … my mother’s -isms started becoming part of my colloquial tongue. I started to say things like see that girl … “she is now growing wings”. When did that become something I said? For all her eccentricities, my mother has influenced me in how I dress, “don’t show your boys your goodies. No one has brought any cows to my yard.” To my faith in God - “you need to believe for yourself. You don’t get to Heaven on my faith bus”. To even my pick in men - “it doesn’t matter who they are, look at where they come from. That will tell you more about the person than the image they are selling to you”.
So you see, I am slowly becoming my mother and I am also slowly becoming one with this truth. Going through the same? What are your signs? Any good stories? Share with us!
Three women going through life.