Yes ladies, I know your biological clock is ticking and you are hella tired of dating phuck boys . Ain’t nothing wrong with simply being ready for Mr. Right to come into your life and seal the deal. But before you get swept off your feet by your knight in shining armor, here are 5 questions in no particular order that you need to ask before you consider entering marital bliss.
1.How do you resolve conflict? – It’s an important question to ask before you say, “I do”. Seriously, the methods that you each use to resolve issues when you both disagree on something says a lot about how healthy your relationship is and how well you communicate with each other. I mean if your partner loves to play the blame game during every argument and “resolves” issues with a screaming match, then that's a red flag, and you might want to talk about this … or run for the hills.
2.How are your finances? we deem this question a vital one to ask before you make a leap into marriage. It’s important to know how to manage your finances. You need to know which one of you is the big spender and which is the saver. How good are you both when it comes budgeting? Should you two have a joint bank account? Will you two split your bills equally between each other? Differences in how finances are handled have ended many marriages, and in order to avoid the “D” word in your marriage, please make sure to discuss your finances in advance.
3.What are your expectations from each other? Yes, y’all please layout what your expectations are, you know, what you require from your partner and vice versa before stepping into a marriage. You need to know what you can tolerate and what you cannot, what you will compromise on and what you will not. And what the deal breakers are for each of you. This is extremely important because what you require and accept is what you will get from your partner. And you will end up being really disappointed thinking someone will do for you as you do for them if you do not verbalize your needs and expectations.
4.Do you share the same faith and beliefs? Religion and spiritual connections can make or break your marriage. It’s so important to know and understand where you two stand on this topic. The stronger you are in your faith or religious beliefs, the more difficult it is to compromise on this, especially if you decide to have children. So please iron this out before thinking you can get into a marriage and change someone to believe in what you believe.
5.Do you understand each other’s love languages?- We wrote a whole post on this topic. In a relationship and especially in marriage, it is so important for you to know how your partner responds to feeling love and/or appreciated. Knowing your partner's love language can help you overcome those moments of frustration when your partner may feel underappreciated or unloved. .. To learn more about love languages, check out our post.
Are you ready to say I do? Were these questions helpful? What other questions would you recommend for our readers?
Three women going through life.